In our recent Tea Talk With Amy episode 4, I sat down with my good friend and sundays enthusiast, Alana Frankfort of Founders Lab, to have an honest and candid discussion about what it’s like to be a new mother.
I met Alana at a Foundermade event years ago, before she became a mother. What I love about her is whenever she walks in, pouring over with confidence, it feels like she owns the room. What an awesome superpower! I got to know her better when we worked on a few projects together. I would describe Alana as someone who has a big heart, and who always tells you exactly how she feels in the most honest way.
It was mind-blowing to sit down with Alana for our Tea Talk, to learn more about her experience with motherhood. I am not a mom, but I have always been super curious about parenting and, in fact, read a couple of parenting books to help better understand my own parents. Unfortunately, I found none of the books explicitly touched upon what Alana shared about what it was like after giving birth.
If you go into any bookstore, you will find a well-stocked parenting section. Surprisingly, even though there’s ample information available to expecting and new parents, there is very little out there that dives fully into the unique and dramatic emotional and physical challenges that can impact new moms post-birth. This is one exam that you can’t study up for!
After giving birth, I understand that it takes awhile for your body to recover; even a few weeks afterwards, you might still look pregnant. I learned this from our loyal client, Mellisa Wood’s post, otherwise I would have had no idea. I’ve always believed that we don’t have to sacrifice for beauty and it’s okay to embrace every part of your life — mothers, you are beautiful, even when you’re body and mind are undergoing changes as drastic as the post-birth phase.
I really appreciated Alana candidly sharing about her depression and emotional struggle after giving birth. She said that this stage is often romanticized, but in her experience she did not feel prepared. I didn’t realize the adjustment a new mother experiences to really start feeling like herself again and the guilt and struggle that may go along with it.
These are just a few tips that Alana has for new mothers:
- Live one hour at a time and one day at a time. I think this applies to any tough situation in life and is the essence of living in the present.
- Talk about your experience. You will be surprised by how many people might have a similar experience as you. Talking about it will help you will feel less alone and there are a lot of supporters out there. Just think about it, your story may help someone else!
- Embrace it, or as Alana says, “ Rock it.” “I enjoy being pregnant and I just rock my body to the day of giving birth,” she shared. It’s really an awesome way to see things: when life changes or something big happens, you can either reject it or embrace it. Fun food for thought: the change may help us learn more about ourselves.
Thank you, Alana, for sharing with us the good, the bad, and the ugly about the most important job you will ever have!